Ever since those first two teams touched the turf in 1967, the NFL Super Bowl has permeated televisions across the country year after year. Whether you’ll be hanging in your common room, heading to a mod, or cramming as many people as possible into a CoRo double, Super Bowl parties will be a great way to finish the weekend, because Super Bowl parties have a way of bringing a wide range of people together. Before you go, tune in to who we think will be among the attendees…
1. The Die Hard
The ‘Die Hard’ tops our list just like he tops every fan page across the web. He or she will be sporting their team’s jersey, hat and matching socks alike. This person will be seen on the edge of their seat the entire game, yelling obscenities at the television. If their team loses, you won’t see the Die Hard for at least a week as they mourn the loss like they would a relative. The Die Hard will go to whichever party has the biggest television to ensure best possible coverage.
2. The Commercial Critic
Despite the hard-hitting action of the game itself, the commercial critic heads to the parties for another reason: to watch the hilarious, obnoxious, at times ridiculous, commercials that intervene with each time out. With advertisement slots costing millions of dollars, these commercials never fail to entertain. So don’t condemn the Commercial Critic too hard because, hey, we like to watch them too.
3. The Clueless Girlfriend
The Clueless Girlfriend is easy to spot because she’ll be wearing an identical jersey to the guy sitting next to her. “It just so happens” that they like the same team, how cute! These types will be sure to sit front and center, and you’ll occasionally hear a “Go team!” in between plays. Don’t bother questioning the Clueless Girlfriend about anything football related because, you know, she’s clueless.
4. The Red Sox Fan
You can always count on a Red Sox Fan to appear at any BC party, and the Super Bowl is no different. They’ll be sure to sport a “World Series Champs” tee or hat, reminding you that no matter who wins the game, their team already won. And if your team does happen to lose, Red Sox Fans will be there to cheer you up with an oh-so-sensitive, “Don’t worry, at least the Red Sox won.”
5. The Snack Hoard
Free chips AND dip? The Snack Hoard is sure to be at your party, and probably several other parties once your food runs out. They may tune in to a play or two, but will quickly return to their place behind the food table. Go easy on them though; delivery pizza, homemade dips and desserts beat cafeteria food any day of the week.
6. Erin Andrews Wannabe
The Erin Andrews Wannabe will normally be sitting amidst the action, making sure to be within earshot of the greatest number of people. She’ll be sure to enlighten you on every little fact about the teams playing and always shares her input on controversial plays. This girl will most likely be impartial to which team actually wins because she’s studied every single team in the AFC and NFC and can’t possibly pick a favorite. But hey, there’s no denying that the Erin Andrews Wannabe knows her stuff, so all power to her.
7. The “Could CareLess-er”
Their team’s out, so does it really matter who wins this game? Not for the Could Care Less-ers. These people will normally be off to the side, making room for the Die Hards and Erin Andrews Wannabes. They like football, so they make sure to take a break from their phones every now and then to look up at the score. They might avoid the final-minutes frenzy that invades the party, and chances are you won’t see them celebrating when the clock ticks to zero.
8. The Partier
If there’s beer, the Partier is a guaranteed attendee. It’s a Sunday night? YOLO. The Partier lives for these continue-the-weekend nights. The person is, of course, the life of the party, that is, until the game actually begins. At this point, the partier hangs near the beer cooler until half time because really who needs football when you have beer?
9. The Gambler
They’ve got over a hundred bucks on this game, so you can be sure they’ll have a front row seat. Gamblers will usually be grabbing out their hair, chewing their nails or covering their eyes afraid to watch every third down. If their team wins? Take cover. Gamblers don’t care who’s in their vicinity when they take their victory lap.
10. The Peace Maker
Every good Super Bowl party has a Peace Maker. The one who intervenes the heated arguments and makes sure there are enough hot wings for all in attendance. You can be sure to hear a “Come on guys, we’re all friends here,” at least once from the Peace Maker. Yes, maybe they’re a little annoying, but we’re giving them M.V.P. for everything they put up with.
Sunday is fast approaching. So no matter which Super Bowl attendee you are, join in for one of America’s greatest traditions.