I know what you tweeted last summer: One Direction

The other day at work some of the middle schoolers were talking about the "best song ever." The girls were bopping around and singing it like your typical tween "Beliebers," while the boys just sat there trying to play it cool and rolling their eyes. However, they weren't fooling anyone since I saw them mouthing all of the lyrics.  So me, being the "old" adult to all of these younger children, stupidly asked them what the song was called. Their response: "The best song ever!" Yes, I understand that it's the "best song ever" but what is it called?

Their response once again was: "Best Song Ever! Duh, it's the new One Direction song!"

Well thank you teeny boppers for making me feel musically out of the loop and old all at the same time. Now I know how my mom feels when we play our music.

Now I must admit I have never seemed to have caught the One Direction bug. My younger cousin, the die-hard "wake up at 5 am just to catch a glimpse of them walking onto the set of Good Morning America" kind of fan, tried to get me to understand why they are so awesome. However, all she seemed to say was "OMG Harry Styles is sooooo hot!"

Like OK, I get you have a little schoolgirl crush on him, but is their music any good?

She played me their most popular song at the time, "What Makes You Beautiful" and it was definitely the catchy, stuck-in-your-head-all-day kind of song but nothing special.

However, with all of these middle schoolers singing this song all morning in my ear I decided to check the boys out. Probably for the first time all summer I actually have no ill-fated feelings towards a celebrity after reading his or her Twitter account or articles about their daily lives, BUT.....these boys could definitely benefit from a crash course in social media PR.  Their accounts may be innocent but God it makes them seem so dumb.

Harry, as the sort of "lead singer" of the group you are probably the most famous out of the bunch. Therefore, you are in a way the face of One Direction. But for the love of God some of the things you think are better left unsaid.

harry slept all day

 Wow, could not sound like more of a thrilling day! Now I know why you dated Taylor...

harry silver linings playbook

Thanks for that scintillating review Roger Ebert.

harry frisco and discos

harry updates

harry found one

 Thank God!! I was sooo worried you wouldn't!!

harry yoghurt

Now I know in kindergarten when you are first learning to spell they teach you to sound out the words, but come on. You've got to be kidding me right?

Now Zayn, I don't know much about you but tweet less and stick to your day job.

Screen shot 2013-08-07 at 2.20.18 PM

Why you guys think I am interested in what you eat for breakfast is beyond me.

zayn joke 1 zayn joke 2

Oh sweetie...stick to singing. Please.

Louis, to me you are definitely the one I would date out of the group. So please stop tweeting things like this to keep it that way.

louis justin bieber empathisizing with jb

Like...ok? Who do you hang out with...

Liam...oh Liam...just no.

liam spilt liam whats poppington

Seriously, who is this kid's manager and why is he still allowed to have a personal account?

Niall, first things first. Please deactivate your AOL instant messenger screen name and stop using the lingo. This is 2013 not 2004.

niall t

Now I kind of understand why people use certain shorthand abbreviations on social media because you’re usually limited in characters. But saving room by abbreviating “to” to “t” makes absolutely zero sense. Like it’s not even a real thing. Maybe next time you could take a few of the o’s from that cheer or whatever it is you’ve got going on there and add it to those t’s that just look plain dumb alone.

So boys, just learn how to use your Twitter accounts and we can stay on amicable terms. Please don't become the next Ryan Lochte of social media.

Like what you see? Join the Gavel here!

Comments

Avatar